Zu viel Kaffee
You Know You've Had Too Much Coffee When....
1. You answer the door before people knock.
2. Juan Valdez names his donkey after you.
3. You have to watch videos in fast-forward.
4. You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.
5. You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there.
6. You've worn out three pairs of tennis shoes this week.
7. Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
8. Your T-shirt says, "Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend".
9. You can jump-start your car without cables.
10. Your only source of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low".
11. You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug.
12. You've built a miniature city out of the little plastic stirrers.
13. You've worn the finish off your coffee table.
14. You're so wired you pick up AM radio.
15. Instant coffee takes too long.
16. When someone says, "How are you", you say, "Good to the last drop".
17. You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can.
18. You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
19. You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.
20. You soak your dentures in coffee overnight.
21. You introduce you spouse as your coffeemate.
22. Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.